2. Love system

Love also exists, and Love is a system made of 2 main elements: a Lover and a Loved one (s).

2.1  Love manifestation

I will use the 7 examples that correspond to Greek words for Love; to describe the behaviour of anyone that falls in Love.

Let’s first focus on Love between man and wife, parents and children, leader and followers, people and animals, people and objects, and people with GOD. Later I will come back to Love for brothers, guests and self-love.

When Love catches someone, they start to behave as follows:

1.  A man and a woman (probably Eros).

 When a man meets a girl and feels attracted to her, these are the things that will unconditionally happen in him:

He wants to own her: when a man sees a girl and feels like he wants her, he will approach her in ways to get her attention but more like he wants to drive her in his ways because whatever you love, you want to own it. Naturally, men are the ones to make the first move in Love. They are Love initiators. Once she is in the same mood, a serious man goes for marriage, and then she becomes his forever.

Once she is with him, the next step is to provide for her needs.

All men love women’s beauty. They want women who look pleasingly, presentable, and elegant. That’s why Love leads them to improve their life.

A man is in charge of his wife’s comfort. He ensures that she feels his closeness, his company and safe. He ensures that she is comforted and entertained (sexual attraction is part of entertainment).

Women love visionary husbands who know the purpose of life. They want men who can guide, encourage, and motivate them.

2. A parent and a child (Storge)

Children are always born and grow in the presence of their parents.

Parents are naturally responsible for raising their children, providing all their needs, including food, clothes, etc.

As parents think about their children’s future, they are involved in anything that improves children’s lives.

The parents are always worried about anything that will take away their children’s joy. So, they comfort them, entertain them and ensure that their children are happy, safe and protected.

They raise them with Love, teaching them about life, moral values, and how to live with others and behave in society. Parents are in charge of teaching their children to love others and obey elders and GOD.

3. A leader and followers

The followers are always in the leader’s zone (where his authority controls).

He ensures that they are all satisfied. He provides and ensures that everyone has all the basics necessary to function towards society’s goal. For example, if he is a local leader, he makes sure that all his members have the basic needs: the house, health, food, water…

He is in charge of every follower’s improvement; he studies the environment and provides infrastructures that will help people’s lives in the future. He uses his best authority and efforts to achieve everyone’s development.

He is in charge of providing a pleasant environment for his followers by solving their problems, providing entertainment and comfort zones, easy ways of doing things, and ensuring that they are always happy and feel loved. A good leader treats his followers as his own children. Therefore, he must set an example for his people to see themselves through him.

A good leader is always called a visionary leader, a life coach, a motivator, a planner, a problem solver, etc

He teaches them to listen to him and obey his superiors and GOD.

4. Human and animal

Let’s say you see a lovely cat, and you want it. The first thing you do is take it home to own it (in your presence).

You will feed it.

You will make sure it has a pleasingly looks and is presentable to you

You will protect it and ensure it is safe, healthy, and entertained (cats love someone who rubs them. That’s a feeling for any living creature, even human beings love to be touched).

You will teach the cat to stay home, to play and obey you. Did you know that humans’ first assignment was to care for animal creation? (Genesis 1:26-28).

5. Human and objects: A car

If I love a car: the same things happen:

the 1^st thing I do is to buy it and take it home (in my presence).

I will provide petrol.

I will make sure that my car is always serviced, shiny and presentable.

I will protect it from thieves or any other damage.

The car always has to function as I want ( this can be compared to obey), and fulfil its responsibilities, to take me to places.

6. The Love between GOD and humans (Agape).

Did you know that The LORD taught human beings all these principles mentioned above. Yes, of course, He did when He created Adam.

When He created Adam, he brought him into his Home, Eden Genesis 2:8 (a parent keeps his children at home, and all know that we are His children).

He provided all human needs in Eden. He planted all the fruits for food. Genesis 2:9,16,18-19, 22-24.

Adam’s assignment was to care about creation; LORD taught Adam to improve the garden Eden (and all things in it) by cultivating or working it (Genesis 2:15) and caring about animals.

He also asked Adam to protect and keep it (Genesis 2:15)

Last, He commanded Adam and Eve to stay in the Garden (his presence) and obey him. Genesis 2:16-17 GOD taught Adam to obey. He gave him instruction not to eat the tree of good and evil. It happened after Adam was created and put in Eden.

Two elements make Love, and each element has its own responsibilities but completes each other, as we have seen in all the other systems.

Love elements are: a Lover and a Loved one (s).

Every element that makes Love has to contribute to allowing love to function. Elements of Love are members of a social system.

2.2  Love elements and their responsibilities.

Let me extract the main words that keep appearing in these examples to list responsibilities for each element of Love. Whatever you love; you tend to own it; that’s the 1^st responsibility of the Lover. Then the Love provides, improves, comforts, and leads the Loved one. The Loved one is commanded to accept all that Love offers to them to enjoy life.

Notice that the 1^st responsibilities from the Lover side and Loved one side are mutual because Love works well when every element does its responsibility. A Lover brings a Loved one in his presence, then does other 4 responsibilities to keep them in the presence, then the Loved one fulfils their responsibilities by staying in the presence of a Lover.

You cannot care for somebody who’s not present. Reciprocally, you will struggle to be loved if you are far from the Lover. A Lover cannot love someone who doesn’t obey, someone who doesn’t submit (who’s not accessible), who doesn’t listen since the Lover is doing all of these to make loved ones happy, so they can also achieve their purposes. Therefore, a Lover does not have any self-benefit in loving others, except the joy they get from loving others and seeing Loved ones achieving their purposes that leads to the whole society’s purpose.

Loved one (s), on the other hand, will lose interest when a Lover chases self-benefits in their relationship. When a Lover is not providing, the Loved one will doubt. When a Lover is not improving their lives, he is not comforting them, protecting them, or teaching them; they lose interest also. But it is all done to enable each member to accomplish their roles in society.

Unfortunately, nowadays, it is difficult to find true Love because many are confused about what is required from them, and also there is an increase of wickedness in many people’s hearts; the Love of most will grow cold. Matthew 24:12 NIV. (we will see this in the last chapter).

The engine in the car supplies energy to the wheels to enable them to turn and move a car ( more like a leader enabling his followers). The battery must give the power to start and empower the car always when needed. But when it doesn’t happen, it is faulty and needs to be replaced and thrown away. Like other systems, if one of those responsibilities is not applied as the Designer intends, the other side suffers, and the broken one deserves to be replaced and thrown away.

Protecting a wife is one of the husband’s responsibilities; When a wife spends some time alone; she feels lonely and unsafe and call husband on the phone to come home early, it is not that she wants to control him, but mostly she feels lonely and insecure; something is missing in her. Maybe she needs some guidance or advice because naturally, it is difficult for them to stay alone for a long time. A family was not designed to be separated as our society is divided now.

Children will also cry when they don’t see their parents because they don’t feel safe and comfortable. That’s when it is easy for the devil to attack them, both the wife and kids, when they are alone.

2.3  Love structure and Love cycle

Like other systems, Love also has a system structure of 2 elements: Lover and Loved one. As seen above, every element of Love has its own responsibilities, but both are interconnected and interrelated, and all perform as they are designed to be.

When one element is disconnected, Love freezes. Each element is disconnected when it fails to do one of its responsibilities.

Love from a Lover is expressed through acts of caring about Loved ones, which means they must provide (or feed), improve, comfort (protect and entertain), and lead (teach or train) the loved one. Love from a Loved one is expressed through submission to the Lover.

Love from a Lover is expressed through acts of caring about Loved ones, which means they must provide (or feed), improve, comfort (protect and entertain), and lead (teach or train) the loved one. Love from a Loved one is expressed through submission to the Lover.

Children directly connect with the mother and the father through the mother. A mother can directly connect to the husband but cannot directly connect to GOD. If a wife dishonours the husband, she won’t connect to GOD because she breaks GOD’s command. A man must first obey GOD’s command to love his wife as his own body (Ephesians 5:25-33) before he connects with GOD. A child cannot connect directly to GOD but through the parents. GOD cannot hear a child who doesn’t obey his parents (Honor your father and your mother, Exodus 20:12;  Ephesians 6:2). The same as a community leader or a pastor, first ensure the wellbeing of your followers before you go to GOD. When you don’t care about your neighbour, you cannot please GOD. First, reconcile with your brother before giving an offering to GOD. Matthew 5:23-24

Leadership, power, authority and Love come from GOD because He is above all.

2.4  Love laws

These principles are applicable when you want to see the distinction among people in terms of Love responsibilities and where they fit in the Love cycle.

1st Love law: When A is greater than B.

Lover: a Lover is a person that gives Love to others. He is the person in authority who can provide because Love means caring, spending, protecting, and giving everything you have to care for someone. The lovers are motivated by seeing their Loved ones happy, comfortable, satisfied, and improved.

E.g., A man loves a woman. A parent loves children. GOD loves people.

NB: A Lover cannot be more than one unless arranged in a hierarchy (you cannot have 2 bosses, 2 husbands or 2 masters: Matthew 6:24). Once bosses are in the hierarchy, the greater one is the primary source of provision. Everyone gets provision from him, coming down following the hierarchy. So, care comes in the top-down hierarchy, and the submission goes in the bottom-up hierarchy.

For this reason, the greatest person in the social system is the greatest Lover and the one who must work hard to provide and care for the followers because he is given authority to do so. Therefore, others should depend on him.

2^nd law: When A is smaller than B.

A is a Loved one and must be available to be cared for by the Lover. It means they throw themselves into the Lover’s hands. It is called submission ( stay accessible, submissive, listen, trust, obey…)

For example, children must always be available for their parents to be supported. They should never leave their parents’ presence. If they move without their parents knowing where they are, they disobey them, and it is called rebellion. Always evil targets children who are not attended or parented.

Honestly, no one is happy to be in charge of a rude person or a rebel, someone who doesn’t listen, thinks they are smarter than you, or can even replace you.

In Genesis 3:5, we see 2 people who disobeyed GOD because Satan told them they would become clever and become like GOD by knowing good and evil. Which means total independence, to completely get their freedom to do whatever they want or maybe also replace Him. Then the sin followed the whole generation. You know that we are small gods because we are creators and owners, but creating for our self-interests. That’s the real problem!

 3^rd law: when A is equal to B

A and B care for one another and submit to one another; they both can love and be loved. A and B’s responsibilities are reciprocal because they are equal and all have the same ability. Therefore, they can all share the same love responsibilities, care for one another, and submit to one another. In other words, they are called friends and colleagues or Siblings (brothers and sisters), etc.

4th law: when A is inferior to Ø (A< Ø), or A is equal to Ø (A= Ø)

When A is not equal or inferior to anyone (doesn’t submit or care about anyone), A is a self: a self-centred, self-loving, independent, individualist, self-reliant and will tend to be own god. In short, words, when you don’t fall into the Love structure and deny GOD, you become your own god, self-loving god, a rebel.

2.5  Definition of Love

Now we know how Love works and binds Lover and loved ones together. Let’s define Love.

Love is the Spirit that influences Lovers to care for others without self-benefits, and Loved ones also submit to Lover without doubts. Love can also be compared to a social operating system that binds people together and makes the social system function. Love was the original culture of people before they sinned; Love was in the form of humanity. (Humanity, compassion, generosity, kindness, benevolence are all fruits of Love).

Love is the culture that GOD designed, as He wanted people to live this way, but it was interrupted by satan teaching people to rebel and disconnect from GOD. Disciples of JESUS and all early Christians lived in this culture (Acts 4:32-37). GOD will restore this culture after removing evil from this earth (Revelation 21:3-4).

So, Love is also the glue that binds, keeps, ties or holds people together. Without Love, there is no vision in the society, and there is no GOD but division. Love is like a magnet that attracts people’s hearts and makes them one heart with one vision (Colossians 1:17).

Love keeps creation together. Therefore, Love leads the Heavens and the earth, and GOD is Love (Genesis 1:1; John 1:1-3; 1 John 4:8).

We can say Love makes things happen and brings all creatures together. All of us need Love, and can fully satisfy us. Without Love, there is a mess and death. Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).

Love is a life application that every social system needs to function. Love brings all society members together and creates social order (Colossians 3:14) ^[1]. It is also an application to use in any leadership because Love is an original leadership style( I will also explain this in “the social system” book). But for Love to work to the full, every element should perform as expected.

[1] Colossians 3:14, NLT: “Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.”